Most negotiation coaching courses are very good at telling you what to do right but in my experience, very few tell you what you are doing wrong. Last week I was coaching a group of senior sales professionals and I produced this list; whilst not exhaustive, it should act as a guide.

The 40 most common mistakes made by negotiators – recognise any of these from the last time you were involved in a negotiation?

• Failing to prepare effectively for negotiation.

• Underestimating your own power.

• Assuming the other party knows your weaknesses and strengths.

• Being intimidated by the status of the person with whom you are negotiating.

• Concentrating on your problems rather than those of the other party.

• Forgetting the other side has things to gain from agreement as well as yourself.

• Making assumptions about what the other side wants.

• Having low aspirations for yourself.

• Giving too much credence to time deadlines set by the other side.

• Assuming the other side is aware of the short and long-term benefits of reaching agreement.

• Being intimidated by rules set by the other side.

• Misunderstanding tactics used by the other side.

• Talking too much.

• Failing to listen effectively.

• Believing everything the other side says about you, your service, your competition etc.
 
• Being forced into discussing price too early in the negotiation.

• Revealing your hand too early.

• Aiming too low with your opening bid.

• Accepting the first offer.

• Giving away concessions for nothing.

• Conceding an important issue too quickly.

• Making concessions too easily and raising the other sides. expectations.

• Feeling guilty about asking for a concession.

• Making concessions before knowing all the other sides demands.

• Failing to make concessions conditional on final agreement being reached.

• Making concessions of equal size to those on offer.

• Paying too much attention to price rather than value
 
• Discussing issues for which you are not prepared.

• Being inflexible.

• Losing sight of the overall agreement when deadlock is reached over minor issues.

• Responding to a high demand with a counter offer instead of challenging the validity of the high demand.

• Assuming deadlock means agreement is not possible.

• Feeling deadlock is only unpleasant for you and not the other party.

• Trying to be liked during the final stages.

• Bluffing without having a strategy ready should your bluff be called.

• Taking things personally.

• Offering to split the difference…

• Being intimidated by “This is my final offer”!

• Not preparing for the possibility you may need to walk away.

• Carrying out a post-mortem with the other side.

Today’s News: My pal Steve Martinez is always looking outside the square and is never afraid to challenge paradigms, particularly with his marketing. This week, he is asking us to test our selling skills against a robot! Yep, really, and it is a superb challenge, which you will lose He also provides lots of excellent free tools, so do take the test here

Tomorrow: It’s a first time appearance on The JF Guest Author Spot for my good buddy Clayton Shold, with some very profound words of wisdom.

In any kind of negotiation the planning stage is probably the most important. Too often in negotiations we go in badly prepared and end up giving concessions that reduce the overall profitability of the final deal.

The importance of planning is in having a very clear idea before entering into the negotiation.

1. What are my objectives?

2. What does the other side wish to achieve?

3. What information will influence the final outcome of the negotiation?

4. What concessions can I make?

5. How am I going to achieve my objectives?

6. What part will other people play in the negotiation?

Generally, the more time that is spent in planning and preparing for the negotiation, the more beneficial will be the final outcome.

Objectives

Before entering into the negotiation, you need to have a clear idea of your objectives and try to work out those of the other side. Ask yourself the following questions:

1. What exactly do I wish to achieve from this negotiation?

2. Which of my objectives:

a. Must I achieve?
b. Do I intend to achieve?
c. Would I like to achieve?

3. What options or alternatives would be acceptable to me?

4. What are the other side’s objectives?

5. How does the other side see the negotiation?

Information

It has often been said that information is power. In any negotiation, there will be four types of information that is important to the final outcome.

1. What information do I have that the other side has also?

2. What information do I have that the other side does not have?

3. What information do I need to have before negotiating with the other side?

4. What information does the other side need before it can negotiate with me?

This can be particularly important when negotiating with people who concentrate on price issues. What other things are important to this person? What pressures do they have on them to conclude the deal? How well is their company doing at the moment? How important is it that they deal with my company? etc.

The early phases of negotiation consist of both sides finding out more information before talking about a specific deal or set of alternatives.

For example, if you find out the other side has a time deadline that only your company can meet, it may give you the chance to negotiate on more favourable price. If you know that the other side has recently expanded their production capacity, you may be able to negotiate more favourable terms in return for a commitment to buy certain volumes over an agreed time period.

By spending time as part of your preparation in listing what you already know and what you need to know, you will give yourself a better chance to negotiate well on your company’s behalf.

Today’s News: I discovered some excellent new sales related sites this week: The first has been designed and created by an old friend Jan Visser and I was really impressed, think you will be too – www.salesteamtools.com

Tomorrow: Mr Sales Gravy himself, Jeb Blount is my guest on The JF Guest Author Spot

Most successful negotiators recognise that the way people involved in negotiations behave does not always reflect their true feelings or intentions. Today, I am going to discuss negotiating tactics that may be used by you or on you. Whether or not you choose to use these tactics, it is vital to understand:

• Tactics work

• They can be being used on you, and can be used by you

• Once they are recognised as tactics, their effects are reduced or eliminated

You may feel that there is no need in your particular case to negotiate or resort to tactics in negotiation -this relly is a matter of personal choice.

In general, tactics are used to gain a short-term advantage during the negotiation and are designed to lower your expectations of reaching a successful conclusion.

There are many tactics available to negotiators and here are just a few you may recognise.

Pre-Conditioning:

This can begin before you even get together or start your negotiations with the other party. Let us take a sales example:

You telephone for the appointment and the other side says aggressively:

“Don’t bother coming if you are going to tell me about price increases. You’ll be wasting your time and I will be forced to speak to your competitors”.

When you do arrive you are kept waiting in reception for half an hour, without being told why. As you walk through the door into the other person’s office they indicate for you to sit down but they don’t look up. Instead, they sit leafing through your competitor’s brochure, in silence, ignoring your efforts to make conversation.

You are given an uncomfortable low chair to sit in that happens to be directly in line with the sun shining into the office. At this stage, how confident do you feel?

The Monkey On The Back:

Some negotiators have the irritating habit of handing their problems to you so that they become your problems. This is the “monkey on their back” that they want you to carry around for them.

A classic example is the person who says, “I have only got £10,000 in my budget”.

This is often used tactically to force a price reduction. Here is what you can do.

When one side says “I have only £10,000 in budget”, look concerned and say something like:

“That is a problem. As you are no doubt aware, the cost of our systems can be anything up to £20,000 and I really want to help you choose the best system that meets your needs. Does that mean that if one of our systems has everything you are looking for but costs £20,000, you would rather I didn’t show it to you?”

The “monkey” has been returned and they have to make a choice. If the objection is genuine and the budget figure is correct, you must try to look for an alternative that meets your needs as well as theirs.

If they genuinely can only spend £10,000 that is not a tactic but the truth. In dealing with tactics the first decision you must make is whether it is a tactic or a genuine situation. If it is genuine, you have a problem to solve, rather than a tactic to overcome.

The Use Of Higher Authority:

This can be a most effective way to reduce pressure in the negotiation by introducing an unseen third party and can also be effective in bringing the negotiation to a close.

“I need to have this agreed by my Board of Directors.” “If they agree to the terms we have discussed, do we have a deal?”

However, be careful to use this device sparingly so that the other side does not begin to feel you have no decision making authority yourself.

One way of countering this tactic is to say before the bargaining begins: “If this proposal meets your needs, is there any reason you would not give me your decision today?”

If the other side still wishes to resort to higher authority, appeal to their ego by saying: “Of course, they will go along with your recommendations, won’t they? Will you be recommending this proposal?”

Nibbling:

Negotiations can be a tiring process. As the point draws near when an agreement is likely, both sides exhibit a psychological need to reach agreement and get on with something else.

You are very vulnerable as the other side reaches for their pen to sign the order form or contract, to concede items that don’t significantly affect the final outcome. “Oh, by the way, this does include free delivery, doesn’t it?” or “Oh, by the way, the price of the car does include a full tank of petrol?”

Nibbles work best when they are small and asked for at the right psychological moment. Like peanuts, eat enough of them and they get fattening.

Good negotiators will often keep back certain items on their wants list until the very last minute, when the other party is vulnerable. Watch out for this.

The Good Guy And The Bad Guy:

You may have come across this tactic before or else seen it used in films or on television. This is a tactic designed to soften you up in the negotiation.

For example, you are negotiating the renewal of your service contract with the Buying Director and his Finance Director. You present your proposal and the Buying Director suddenly gets angry and walks out in disgust muttering to himself about how unfair you have been and how the relationship is well and truly over.

You pick up your briefcase and are being shown the door when the Finance Director smiles at you sympathetically and says:

“I’m terribly sorry about that. He is under a lot of pressure. I would like to help you renew your contract, but he really will not consider the price you have suggested. Why don’t I go and talk to him for you and see if we can agree a compromise? What is the bottom line on the contract? If you give me your very best price, I will see what I can do”.

The best way of dealing with this tactic is to recognise the game that is being played and assess exactly what the quality of the relationship is. You may be able to say something like:

“Come off it, you are using good guy, bad guy. You are a superb negotiator, but let’s sit down and discuss the proposal realistically”.

If you don’t have this kind of relationship, stand firm and insist on dealing with the bad guy, or else bluff yourself and give a figure that is within your acceptable range of alternatives.

One way of combining good guy, bad guy. with higher authority is by saying things like:

“Well, I’d love to do a deal with you on that basis, but my manager refuses to let me agree terms of this nature without referring back and he refuses to talk to salespeople. Give me your best price and I will see what I can do”

Body Language:

It is important in negotiation to react verbally and visually when offers are made. You may have seen the more theatrical negotiators hang their heads in despair or accuse you of being unfair and souring a perfectly good relationship when you present your proposal. Human nature is such that we can believe and accept these outbursts against us and our negotiating position becomes weaker as a result.

Ensure the next time you are in a negotiation that you react to the other party’s offer. If you show no reaction, they may be tempted to ask for more and more and you will lose the initiative in the negotiation. Also, it is almost certain that their opening offer is higher than the figure for which they are prepared to settle, so it is important that you clearly signal your unwillingness to accept the opening position.

If you reach the point below which you will not go, it is important that you show this with your body language. News readers, when they have finished reading the news, have a habit of picking up their script and tidying up their papers. This tells the world that they have finished their task and are preparing to leave.

Similarly, when you make your final offer, it can be very powerful to collect your papers together and indicate with your body that it really is your final offer. Put your pen away, sit back in your chair and remain silent. Look concerned and keep quiet.

If your voice says final offer but your body is saying let’s keep talking, the other party will disregard what you say and keep negotiating.

The Use Of Silence:

During the negotiation, you may make a proposal and find the other party remains silent. This can be very difficult to handle and often signals disapproval to the inexperienced negotiator. Just as nature abhors a vacuum, so silence induces the need in people to talk.

If you have a proposal to make, make it and ask the other side how he or she feels about it. Having asked the question, sit back and wait for the answer. Whatever you do, don’t change your offer as this could seriously weaken your position.

The Vice:

A common technique used by negotiators when presented with a proposal is to say:

“You’ll have to do better than that.”

The most powerful way of dealing with this is to ask them to be more specific. Whatever you do, don’t weaken your negotiating position in response to the vice by giving anything away, too easily. This will only encourage repeat behaviour.

The Power Of Legitimacy:

People believe what they see in writing. We all assume that if a thing is printed or written down, it is non-negotiable. This is what can make price lists so powerful. If you have to present a customer with a price increase or you wish to encourage an early order to beat a price increase, show something in writing such as an office memo from your boss announcing the increase. This will have a far greater impact than just saying your prices are about to go up.

When presented with a price tag in a shop, ask to speak to the manager and make him an offer. You could be surprised at the results.

And Finally -The Low Key Approach:

Don’t appear too enthusiastic during negotiations. Over-enthusiasm can encourage skilled negotiators to review their strategy and demand more.

If you are in a negotiation and the other side is not responding to your proposal, recognise this could be a tactic and avoid giving concessions just to cheer them up. Salespeople like to be liked and will often give money away in a negotiation, if the other side appears unhappy.

For example, if you are buying a car avoid saying to the seller things like:

“This is exactly what I’m looking for. I really like the alloy wheels”.

Develop a low-key approach. Say things like:

“Well, it may not be exactly what I’m looking for but I might be interested if the price is right”.

I will share some more of negotiation tips next week with you.

Today’s News: I am in the UK with one of my favourite clients and it is now past 11pm - you may have been looking for some inspirational commentary; my question is this – “Who motivates the motivator?” You will discover from Monday, that I intend to make the Blogit far more dynamic  “What JF, even more dynamic?”

Tomorrow:You need to ask? Actually, we are making significant changes to TSE and planning an overhaul of Top 10 Sales Articles – oh, and I am lunching with my son in Cambridge! Have a great w/e, wherever you are- JF

The fundamental difference between selling and negotiation is that selling is a process to identify the fit between what the seller is offering and what the buyer is seeking. Negotiation is the process of agreeing the terms of the deal and is part of the selling continuum. Yet the negotiation should only begin when there is a genuine commitment from the buyer and seller towards a conditional sale.

It is a bit like dating; usually a person is unlikely to book a restaurant until a date has been agreed to. Equally, the person being asked for a date would not particularly care about the restaurant choice unless they were sufficiently interested in attending the date. Once the date has been agreed it’s simply a matter of agreeing/negotiating the type of restaurant, location and time. When an individual is or has committed to do something, their level of interest rises dramatically, which is why the negotiation phase can be a hotbed of emotional intensity and tension.

Excellent salespeople use the selling phase to lay the ground rules for a possible future negotiation by ensuring that they fully understand their prospect’s requirements and decision making process, whilst planting seeds and setting the tone for the negotiation phase. If, for example, you do all the giving through the selling phase, you have established the pre-supposition that you will continue to do all the giving in the negotiation phase. The transition from selling to negotiating can only occur when the desire to do business has been evoked in the prospect.

So, always start with the end in mind:

The benefits of a well-negotiated deal can have a major impact on bottom line profit and naturally, when the buyer and seller enter into a negotiation they both want the best possible deal for their own organisation. It is little wonder that negotiations are viewed as competitions, where the outcome has to yield winners and losers. The ‘winning’ negotiator may experience short-term gains, yet long-term gains may prove harder than winning the lottery. That is why the process of creating an agreement that each party will willingly fulfil is referred to as Win-Win and provides increased probability of sustaining long-term customer relationships. Every negotiation has the potential to achieve one of the following outcomes:

 Win-Lose – where your customer wins a better deal at your expense and can lead to an unprofitable long-term relationship, because you have conceded too much to sustain future account servicing and growth.

 Lose-Win – where you win a better deal at your customer’s expense, which can cause bitterness and resentment, resulting in cancellations and a myriad of issues that stem from negative emotions.

 Lose-Lose – which is symptomatic of inflated egos on both sides that are prepared to ‘fight to the bitter end’ just to do a deal. This outcome creates bitterness and relationships are unlikely to continue past the short term.

 Walk-Away – which is actually a better outcome than all the above, because it preserves the possibility of a future relationship that is profitable for both parties.

 Win-Win – where both parties have made concessions, yet both the buyer and the seller are willing to comply with the agreed terms and share a perception that the outcome was fair to both.

Recognising the importance of Win-Win outcomes is the first step towards planning to create an environment where both people are willing to share information and invest time in the negotiation process.

Some people see themselves as natural, spontaneous negotiators, which may get the adrenaline pumping, yet a lack of planning can result in lost revenues, lost opportunities and lost time. Thorough preparation is more likely to create and instil a high level of self-confidence, as well as create an increased probability for a Win-Win outcome.

Finally,here is a useful checklist of questions that will ensure good preparation practice:

•  Who has the most advantage? (the better bargaining position)
•  How strong is your proposition?
•  How strong is the other party’s proposition?
•  What will you and the other party be asking for?
•  What are your options and alternatives?
•  What is the cost/value of each negotiation point?
•  What are the other party’s worries, frustrations and motivations?
•  What are the fixed and variable points from all sides’ perspectives?
•  What ideally do you want to achieve?
•  What is your fallback position from which you are not prepared to move?
•  What are your fixed points?
•  What can you use as concessions if you decide to trade?
•  What are the real issues for you?
•  Who will be attending the negotiation?
•  What are their roles?
•  What are their positions?
•  Is the decision-maker present?
•  In your team, what roles will you be taking?
•  Who will handle which issues?
•  How would you describe the negotiation style of the other party?
•  How will this affect your own approach in the negotiation?
•  What did you learn from your last negotiation that you can apply to this one?

Today’s News: This promises to be an extremely busy weeek: The new autonomous Top Sales Experts site is due for launch next week and there is still much to do – I will be introducing you to the expanded team, in the next few days.

As it is Monday, I need to remind you that last week’s nominated articles have been posted over at Top 10 Sales Articles Once again, we have some excellent work, so do drop in if you can.

Tomorrow: “The Sales Diva” herself makes a welcome return – Kim Duke is in the JF Guest Author Spot so expect something very sassy!

A skilled negotiator will create high levels of rapport and be sensitive and empathetic to the people they are negotiating with, yet can still be hard on the issues. The ability to separate the people from the issues, and recognise that negotiations are often fraught with emotional intensity, can help sharpen the focus on the interests of the other party to better balance perceptions. If the negotiation doesn’t appear to be going anywhere and your prospect is behaving like a bully you might feel angry and frustrated. You may already have considered simply agreeing to their demands. In difficult negotiations, there are four vital behaviours that can increase your resourcefulness and consequently your opportunities for getting to “Win-Win”.

1. Manage your emotional state

Build rapport by matching the other person’s style, pace and approach until you have achieved a ‘connection’ Personalise the negotiation by using “I” rather than your organisation’s name. This demonstrates your belief in your proposal and highlights your credibility.

In the face of feelings like anger, disappointment, frustration, confusion, and resentment, we often react without thinking. In such a situation mentally detach yourself and think about it before you respond. It helps to reframe attacks and tactical manoeuvres as feedback that the other person’s interests have not been fully acknowledged. Stay focused on your goal of reaching an agreement.

2. Look for quick mutual wins to build the belief “we can agree”

The more abstract your communication the more likely you are to reach agreement. Therefore, seek to gain agreement at an abstract level first and then get into the detail. For example, if two people wanted what appears to be very different things, such as a) nuclear disarmament and b) more resources spent on defence, if you looked at finding out both sides highest intention, you may discover that ‘peace’ was the desired outcome for both people. Therefore, at this abstract level they have found agreement so the negotiation can continue by gradually getting more detailed. Questions that chunk up your prospect into the bigger picture include:

- For what purpose?
- What’s your intention behind (negotiating point)?

Seek to address the easy/quickest areas of agreement first to reinforce the process of agreement is simple and straightforward. If you discover an area where agreement may not be reached quickly then agree to leave it until later. If some points become contentious it can help discussions if you both move your body, because the mind and body are connected, physical movement helps to create mental movement. That’s why a walk can work wonders during tough negotiations. Provide regular summaries of what you have both accomplished to install the belief that the negotiation is making progress.

Some sales people write out all the points to be negotiated on separate sheets of paper, then ask each point is agreed they move the paper to a different place, so that the buyer can physically see the progress being made which serves to motivate the entire process.

3. Use active listening skills and ask questions to give you a greater understanding of the other person’s viewpoint

Giving good attention to people makes them more intelligent. Poor attention makes them stumble over their words and appear stupid. You are best positioned to change someone’s mind after you have listened to that person. People tend to close down and stick to their position until they feel heard. The goal of active listening is for you to hear and understand other people – their words, thoughts, and feelings, and to let them know you’ve heard and understood them.

Acknowledge their motivations, feelings, and point of view, even when you don’t agree with what they are saying. Your goal is to understand the message, not judge the validity of what they say.

4. Build trust by negotiating fairly

Demonstrations of power erode trust. If you are on the receiving end of this type of behaviour, describe your observations, and the consequences of continuing the current process. For example: “You know you’ve named what seems to me a low price, and so now I’ll name a higher price, and then we’ll each insist on our position until one of us gives in. I don’t find my best negotiations work like this.“

Then propose a different way to proceed, for example: “It would help me to understand the criteria of a fair offer if we could take a look at some of the relevant standards in this industry.” Before beginning the negotiation it can help to agree the ground rules and stick to them. Act with integrity and hold a healthy respect for the intentions of the individual you are negotiating with. There is always a reason why a point of negotiation is important to the buyer and if we can appreciate more about their underlying reasons, this knowledge can be used and acted upon.

Today’s News: OK, it’s yesterday’s news But I was distracted by my daughter’s birthday, so I do have a legitimate excuse: Over on Salesopedia, Clayton Shold is in conversation with Art Sobczak on “Dealing with Objections” and as Clayton observes – “This guy is a real pro!” Check it out here

Tomorrow: I rest? No, not yet – we are burning the midnight oil working on The JF Consultancy site.

Next week, I will be revealing the expanded line-up for the brand new Top Sales Experts site; it really is a “who’s who” of the very best sales gurus in the world – more soon.

So, as ever, have a great w/e and do make it back here on Monday please – JF

A “Win-Win” negotiation can only be achieved if both parties are prepared to concede some of their ‘would like to have’s’ in favour of preserving their ‘must have’s’. The way concessions are handled is a vitally important negotiating skill and can have a huge impact on the final result. Below are ten tried and tested tactics to help you.

1. Discover and agree all the points for negotiation before it begins. Ensure that for each one of these points you have identified whether it is a fixed or a variable point from your perspective. (Variable means that there is some flexibility of movement.) If you have a separate meeting scheduled for your negotiation, it’s a good practice to send out you points for negotiation prior to your meeting. This ensures that both parties aren’t presented with any sudden surprises.

2. Increase the number of points for negotiation (if possible) because you increase the opportunities for a trade. If you only negotiate on price you are potentially setting the stage for a Win-Lose outcome. People very rarely buy on price alone, which is why it’s important to do a thorough fact find at the beginning of the sales process, to flush out the buyer’s list of requirements.

3. Always trade concessions (as opposed to giving them away). This means that for each point where you agree to a concession, you’ll want the buyer to make a concession in return. If you give a concession without requesting a return concession then you’ll be unlikely to get one afterwards. Therefore, it helps to preface your concession with the words ‘what if’. For example, “What if I offered you this (specify concession), what could you offer me in return?” As soon as you begin the process of trading concessions you are creating a frame for agreement, this underpins the belief that together you can reach an overall agreement.

4. Make concessions in small incremental amounts, gradually. If you offer up a large concession too quickly you could create the perception that ‘you loaded the deal’. It’s always best to aim to hold something in reserve for those buyers that are tougher with their negotiations, and present every concession as if it has huge value to you. When presenting concessions use features and benefits to really highlight the value that you are offering.

5. If the price changes, change the deal. This can help to maintain your credibility and justifies the reason for the price change. If you simply comply with a request to lower your prices then you imply that you were asking too much originally.

6. Use a calculator to quantify the impact of price decreases overall. For example, a couple of cents or euros on a large deal could equate to a huge amount over a twelve month period. This can be useful to show just how much you are offering in the long term. It’s a good idea to calculate the long-term value of every concession you are offering.

7. It can be disadvantageous to have your opening offer completely disregarded so encourage the buyer to go first with their offer if you can. Sometimes the buyer offers more than the sales person was prepared to accept, yet avoids having to do so because they kept quiet and let the seller go first. It also provides you with the opportunity to evaluate their opening stance in terms of the possibility of getting an overall result. If their opening offer is ridiculously low then they may not be taking the negotiation as seriously as you.

8. Make each concession really count. People have a tendency to appreciate what they have worked hard to get. If the winning of a concession is too easy then you are depriving the buyer of some emotional satisfaction. This is also an ideal time to request the opportunity to consult with another individual within your organisation. If the buyer sees that their requested concession appears to be outside of your own authority limits, then this helps to build the case that they have negotiated well.

9. Be creative when generating concessions. Work with the other party to generate a variety of options and brainstorm each option neutrally. You’ll be amazed at how many good ideas are created when this process is allowed to occur. You can help this process prior to the negotiation by seeking input and ideas from other people in your organisation. Often, getting some alternative suggestions from people who are not involved in the deal, can provide you with some refreshing new insights.

10. Leave price until last so you build a sense of agreement between both parties. Aim to discover what the buyer really needs when they request a particular price. At the end of a negotiation, the buyer has made an investment of time and has demonstrated a desire to do business with you by making concessions. Therefore, to reach a stalemate at this final stage will be viewed as a waste of their time. Before tackling the price, summarise all the concessions that you have made and where possible attach a value to them. This amount can look even more impressive if you total this over a twelve month period. Always have a list of the buyers agreed requirements in front of you so that you can show the buyer just how many of them  you have already met.

Today’s News: The Top Sales Experts team have been approached by a publisher to put Volumes One and Two, plus Volume Three, due our at Christmas, into hardback, just in time for the festive period and I think we will do it – providing we can gather in all the copy in time, so as I always say, watch this space: Volume Two launched last week, as you know and has already been downloaded 1000 times – fantastic. If you haven’t read it yet, please see the banner in the left hand column.

Tomorrow: One of the leading networking experts in the world if not the leading authority on the subject, my good friend Andrea Nierenberg makes a welcome return to the JF Guest Author Spot - so if you want to learn more about winning business contacts and influencing people, do tune in.

JF Guest Author Spot

“Are You A Spoiled Brat Negotiator?” by Kim Duke

I was pushing my chocolate-laden shopping cart at the grocery store the other day (yes – Divas grocery shop!) and saw a power negotiator in action.

This person was persistent, passionate and absolutely on purpose!

They were also less than 4 feet high.

Yeah -you guessed it lady – I saw a 6 year old girl with pig-tails seriously work her mother for a different kind of yogurt.

I know – yogurt? (if it had been me – it would have been sugar cereal or a chocolate bar all the way!)

You got it – this little blonde, blue-eyed dynamo was determined she wasn’t going to have to eat the stuff out of the “big” plastic, boring container. She wanted the stuff in the colorful tubes instead!

I kid you not – this is what I heard her say…(this child should be teaching sales)

“But Mom – this kind tastes better and I always eat it at school.”

BINGO!

Mom folded like a taco and a little girl got her box of tube yogurt. And a Sales Diva received some inspiration for a column!

Are You A Spoiled Brat At Negotiating?

This little girl absolutely “Wowed” me with her negotiating skills because she inadvertently said what her mother needed to hear. Benefit. Benefit. Benefit.

So she actually wasn’t a spoiled brat negotiator at all.

But YOU probably are.

One of the biggest reasons most people SUCK at negotiating is because it’s all about ME, ME, ME!

Remember – a successful negotiation is not where you have STICKY FINGERS.

Follow these 5 Bossy Sales Diva Rules Instead:

1. Stay calm. If you’re stamping your feet in the sandbox about what you want and lose all sense of logic…well then – you have just become vulnerable in the world of negotiating. And you’re about to lose your favorite toy. (in my world – this means MONEY)

2. Pouting doesn’t work. If your potential customer isn’t seeing the value of what you offer – that’s YOUR ISSUE and not theirs. No one likes a defensive cry-baby.

3. Share Your Toys. A successful negotiation is where both parties feel like it was a Win-Win. No one should feel they were “taken for a merry-go-round-ride”.

4. Play With The Right People. Are you really busy chasing people who have no need for your services? You’re going to get a lot of rejection. Be super clear on who your target audience is.

5. Don’t Reward Bad Behavior. Hey – stop giving discounts to people who always want the cheapest price or who only want to buy something small. Reward your loyal customers, or people who are making a large commitment of time and investment in you.

When I was a kid, my sister’s favorite expression to me was “You’re not the BOSS of me!”

She was right.

The only person who is THE BOSS OF YOU – IS YOU.

It’s time you grew up and realized that you have VALUE and you don’t have to be the cheapest kid on the block. You don’t need everyone to like you – you just need more of the kinds who do.

So there.

Kim Duke, The Sales Diva, provides savvy, sassy sales training for women small biz owners and entrepreneurs. Kim works with clients internationally, showing them The Sales Diva secrets to success! Sign up for her saucy and smart FREE e-zine and receive her FREE Bonus Report “The 5 Biggest Sales Mistakes Women Make” at www.salesdivas.com

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“4 Tips – Defending Price & Selling More In Competitive Markets” by Gavin Ingham    
  
 Once upon a time, in a far off land there lived a happy salesperson that had products and services that were new and fresh. He had no competition and he could easily stay ahead of the marketplace. The clients loved his visits because he could educate and entertain them and they were always enthralled by his amazing new solutions to their problems and challenges…

Did this mythical, unicorn of a salesperson ever exist? I doubt it!

I agree that the marketplace is maybe quicker and faster than it ever was but sales is all about competition.

If you have a good idea, someone will nick it!

You are very lucky that you may have had some time in that mythical, fantasy land of being the only magazine in the marketplace but it was never going to last… The aim of the game now is to help your clients to understand that you are bigger, better and more relevant for their needs than your competitors.

Here are some tips to sell more…

1. Stop trying to convince them and start “knowing” that you’re the best.

Sit down and think about all of the services that you have to offer that are better than those of your competitors. Clients don’t like desperate salespeople. You need to “act as if” you are the only company worth dealing with in the marketplace. Do not be arrogant and remember… perception is projection.

2. Remember that your clients probably don’t really think that you are all the same.

But they know by telling you this they put you on the back foot. Most clients think that they have the upper hand and that we are all desperate to do business with them at any cost. Don’t be so eager, take your time and plan your responses to start to redress this balance.

3. Plan and learn objection handles for common objections.

Preparation is key to sales. The only way you will get better is by thinking through situations and asking yourself the question, “How can I deal with that better next time?”

With your specific objection…

“We already advertise in ABC magazine and it is distributed in the same way as yours.”

What about something like…

“That’s fine I’m not asking you to change now, merely have a look at our services to see how they might complement your existing services.”

Or…

“That’s fine, business is built on relationships. At this stage, all I want to do is find out a little more about you and your business and see how we might be able to benefit you in the future.”

Or even…

“That’s great. I’m pleased you realise the importance to your business of advertising in this medium however our distribution is not the same as theirs. I’m not asking you to change now, merely have a look at our services and see how they might complement your business objectives in the future. Tell me, how often do you advertise with…?”

Remember – the objective is to get them talking, find out why they are using the service, discover their objectives, understand how successfully they are meeting those objectives and then offer something better and more relevant to them.

For more on objection handling have a look at my book Objections! Objections! Objections! available on www.amazon.co.uk, ISBN 1-905225-05-9.

4. Perception is everything.

Even if your services are exactly the same as your clients (or indeed are not as good!) it is whether the client thinks they are or aren’t that matters. This means that you can ALWAYS create the perception that your services are more relevant to them.

On your second point, you are right in your strategy. There is no-one more destined for failure than a one-trick-salesman. You need to be approaching both new customers to the service and customers of your clients. As you have rightly pointed out, these two groups of customers will often require different sales strategies.

For the potential clients who don’t advertise at present make sure that you keep the pressure off to start with. They will more than likely have been “sold” to before so when they object that they “have looked before and it’s not for them” objection handle with a gentle reframe…

“That’s fine. I’m not asking you to buy now merely have a look at how our services might complement your existing advertising strategies. Tell me, how do you currently…?”

Then get interested in their current situation, how they advertise, what their objectives are and how you might be able to help them now or in the future.

Let’s face it – until you ask and listen you’re not going to know whether you can help them or not.

Best of luck and remember to sell with passion.

For the last 10 years, Gavin Ingham has been helping sales people to explode their sales performance by turning self-doubt, fear and lack of motivation into self-belief, confidence and action. Visit http://www.gaviningham.net  now to join Gavin’s free monthly newsletter packed full of sales secrets, strategies and tactics.

The Wall Street Journal calls my very good friend, Andrea Nierenberg “a networking success story.” She is a master at helping individuals and companies build their businesses by improving relationships. Critical to sales success are well-honed communication skills. Andrea shares her list of eight essential communication skills. She suggests they are common sense but not common practice. Andrea shares what she feels is THE most important communication skill with my buddy Clayton Shold of Salesopedia. You might be surprised at her suggestions on how you can stand out from your competitors. All this in less than ten minutes! You can catch it here