Trust and Respect – A Distant Memory?


I have never been one for “La nostalgie” – I have always preferred to look forward in the belief that what comes next will always be better that what has just been.

Witness a room full of divorcees who have since re-married and ask them if they are not now happier with their new partners than they were with their previous ones – they nearly all will be.

Or conduct a survey of employees who have experienced redundancy but are now re-employed – they will all be much more content in their new positions.

When I am coaching my students on the power of self-belief, inevitably we have to discuss that most evil and cancerous state of mind that mankind has inflicted upon itself – negativity: I ask them to imagine a barrel of two hundred and forty healthy apples. I then ask them to mentally place one rotten apple half-way down the barrel, and leave it there for just one week.

Now, you would think that with odds of two hundred and forty to one, the rotten apple would be transformed, but we know that does not happen, and in just seven days so many of it’s fellow apples who had previously been in such rude health, are now infected.

Happened in your office? I bet it has. You see, despite what most people believe, negativity is always stronger.

Why? – Well quite simply it is far easier to be negative than it is to be positive.

Much easier to criticise, complain or condemn, than it is to praise.

In my experience successful people are always more positive than negative. It’s as if they have invisible plastic wings on their shoulders which prevent them from constantly looking backwards. They focus on the future, determined to make it better than the past. They refuse to carry the pain, the hurt, the disappointments, the poor results from previous times on their backs in a huge sack.

These are still difficult times that we are now living in – but nothing more than that. It was inevitable; bound to happen, as I have discussed within previous posts.

What is important is that we use the experience to make things better, and to learn from the mistakes that have been made. We must continue to expose the people and the actions that have placed us in this alarming predicament and ensure that it never happens again – we owe that to our children and their children.

But we must move on – look forward and not drown in a pool of self-pity. Whatever comes next will be better, you can count on it.

I feel certain that you will have read this before, but it is worth repeating in the context of this post …

Winners & Losers

  • A Winner makes mistakes and admits – “I was wrong”

A Loser says -” It was not my fault”

  • A Winner credits his/her good luck for winning - though it wasn’t luck

A Loser blames bad luck for losing - but it wasn’t luck

  • A Winner works harder than a loser and has more time for leisure

A Loser is always busy - too busy staying a failure

  • A Winner shows he/she is sorry by making up for it

A Loser says he/she is sorry but does it again next time

“The Winners in life constantly think in terms of I can, I will and I am. Losers on the other hand concentrate their waking thoughts on what they should have done or what they don’t do” – Dennis Waitley

And you never know, maybe one day we will even re-discover trust and respect.


News: I do urge you to pop over to Top Sales Awards and nominate your favorites – it only takes a couple of minutes, and you know the recipient of your favor will thank you!


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