Communication is successful, only if it achieves your desired results. It doesn’t matter if you think you’ve communicated well or if you think you’ve been crystal clear, what matters is that your communication is received and acted upon in the manner you wanted.

How many times have you said something to another person who has totally misinterpreted what you meant? Equally, sometimes we are on the receiving end of communication that makes us feel bad. If we can look beyond the communication and try to see a positive intention behind another person’s behaviour, then our relationships and interactions with people become more constructive and empowering.

When we communicate with people and if they are ‘not getting’ our point, then the responsibility is ours to adapt our approach until they do.

For example; if we have communicated a price increase and the reasons for that price increase, and our customers have not understood those reasons, the responsibility for this mis-communication lies with ourselves. Therefore, we can only judge the success of what we have communicated based on the reactions we get from other people.

Resistance from another person usually signals a lack of rapport.

Rapport is a vital ingredient when developing relationships because it builds trust and allows communication to flow. When that state of rapport is there, communication is a lot easier even if you do not agree with the other person. When we do not feel that rapport or connection, we have a tendency to ‘nit-pick’ or find fault.

Customers respond to people they perceive understand their position and are on the same wavelength. If we are encountering lots of resistance from a prospect or a customer, then it helps us to notice that we have not built sufficient rapport. Even if our prospect does not agree with what we are saying, rapport enables us to have an open discussion where we can get an honest reason for their reaction rather than a ‘prickly’ brick wall.

Flexibility improves success.

The greater your flexibility, the greater your chances for achieving what you want. If we accept that, every person is a unique individual then we have to accept that each prospect and customer will require a different approach. Using the same approach with all prospects and customers is like playing the lottery; the chances of getting it right are extremely low. If we have high levels of flexibility that allows us to adapt to each prospect and customer’s style then we are able to build more rapport and reduce resistance.

Albert Einstein gave the definition of insanity as doing the same thing repeatedly whilst expecting a different result.

As an example, think about a fly…have you watched how many times a fly bumps its head trying to fly out of a window? I guess that is why it is a fly. The more we are able to adapt, the more opportunities we create.

If what you are doing is not working, try something different and if that does not work try something different again. Flexibility of thinking and behaviour creates awesome sales people.

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