Last week I posted on getting to “win-win” in negotiation. Today I want to look at the two distinct negotiation styles.

Our style of negotiation will be influenced by the style of the other party. If both sides are adversarial; there will be little trust between the two parties, however, if one side decides to be co-operative, there is a danger the other side will use this apparent sign of weakness to their advantage.

Co-operative bargaining has the advantage of being a more efficient style of negotiation, however certain rules have to be followed by both parties for it to work. Let us look at the two styles of bargaining and their features:

Features Of Adversarial Bargaining:

• Each side takes up a position and defends it.

• Opening bids are set at unrealistic levels; too high or too low, in order to give room for manoeuvre.

• Movement is small or non-existent until later on in the negotiation.

• Tactics are used to gain short term advantage.

• Too much emphasis is placed on trust. .This really is my best price!

• Information is withheld, or misrepresented.

• The outcome is often “win-lose”, or “lose-lose”.

• The more aggressive negotiator usually does best.

• This style does not encourage long term, mutually beneficial relationships.

• Neither side asks enough questions, or explores alternatives in sufficient depth.

Features Of Co-Operative Bargaining:

• Each side recognizes that the other has needs and feelings and accepts implicit rules.

• Objective measures are taken of what is fair and reasonable.

• Trust is not an issue as either side is willing to share information.

• This style is friendly, but not soft. There is a willingness to trade concessions.

• There is a clear, communicable strategy.

• Bad behavior is punished.

• This style involves creative problem solving.

• It encourages long term, mutually profitable relationships.

• Each side asks more questions and explores alternatives, rather than taking up fixed positions.

• The usual outcome is “win-win”

Today’s News:

Systems still remain down and are likely to so until at least Monday, if not Wednesday of next week. Am I frustrated? You betcha!

As with all things in life, the quality of the preparation affects the final outcome and this is certainly true when it comes to planning and preparing a presentation.

I have experimented with a number of methods over the years, but I do believe that the simplest are usually the best.

The Collection:
Over a period of time think all round the subject and note down on a large sheet of paper or indeed several sheets, everything that comes into your head about the subject of your presentation. This is rather like a personal brain storming session and should be done roughly, in the order in which the thoughts occur; do not attempt to write a speech at this stage

The Central Theme:
This second method requires you to decide on the exact message you want to get across and writing it down in one simple sentence. Then you think all around the sentence, scribbling down the ideas as they come to you – this method is almost identical to ‘mind-mapping

Before selecting or rejecting any idea, it is important to decide:-

• Who are my audience?

• How much do they know already?

• How much time will I be allowed?

Having taken account of the answers to those three key questions, it should be possible to answer one further one -

• What do I want to say?

This is the stage at which you can decide your headings and sub-headings and put them into a logical order. Your structure then begins to take shape. Essentially you go back to the notes you made during the ‘ideas’ stage and select which ones you wish to use – and then put them in the right order.

Remember you probably will not have time to tell your audience all you know about your subject – after all this is not an ‘information dump’ Use only what is relevant and what can be dealt with in the time at your disposal – this may involve a ruthless reduction exercise.

It is suggested that if possible leave the speech, once written, for 24 hours. Then re-read and revise, removing any jargon or unnecessarily flowery phases or faulty reasoning.

The actual notes that you speak from can be the final draft of the speech but this will normally cause you to read most or all of the presentation and the audience will find this dull.

It is much better, therefore, to read the final draft and put it to one side. Then, without referring to it, write short, key-word notes or, if you are very experienced, headings only, on to numbered post-cards.(Numbering your cards will prove to be an invaluable exercise in the unlikely event you drop them half way through your presentation!)

You can now re-look at the final draft to check that you have included all the major ideas on the cards, but be careful, the chances are that if you forgot that idea when making out the cards, you will forget it when you make the presentation.

And Finally -Final Notes:
Unless you are a very good actor with a phenomenal memory, do not dispense with notes by memorising a speech ‘parrot-fashion’. Unless your audience are ornithologists, they do not want to listen to a parrot!

Also, it is easy to lose your way when giving a memorised presentation and easier still to lose an audience.

Today’s News:

What a day yesterday! I got hit by a lightening strike and all my systems are down possibly until Monday. Posts will continue thanks to the chief elf, so please bear with me.

It is time to discover if you are currently selling in a traditional way or if in fact, you are already selling consultatively.

Vending or Traditional Selling:

• You ‘sell’ to purchasing managers

• You ‘sell’ product

• You defend price

• You fill-out order forms

• You detail features and benefits

• You are a salesperson

• You sell ‘to’

Selling As a Consultative Specialist:

• You plan & consult with business managers and decision makers

• You sell profit improvement systems

• You offer a return on investment

• You present a partnered profit plan

• You design improved performance

• You are a business development manager

• You sell ‘with’

Today’s News: Actually, we can be even more accurate than that – here is an interactive assessment you can take, which will provide you with an immediate result. HERE

Handling any sort of conflict requires you to draw on all your resources. In particular your communication skills.

The reality is that we all have many communication skills but don’t always use them effectively, and certainly we do not take the opportunity to improve them as often as we should

We relate to people on two levels:

Consciously: when we carefully select our words, gestures and behaviours.

Subconsciously: when unknowingly we send out subliminal messages. These often have the most impact on people and can make them feel uncomfortable

Listening Skills:

There are two aspects to communicating: receiving and sending messages i.e. it is a two way phenomenon.

Would you say you are a good listener? Consider the following questions:

• Do you have a tendency to interrupt or finish other people’s sentences?

• Do you find yourself losing patience or concentration?

If so, you need to work on your listening skills. Or:

• Do you stay focused when another person communicates with you?

• Do you make notes, give good feedback and demonstrate that they have your full attention?

Showing people you are listening by nodding and asking questions is a good way of demonstrating that you are taking them seriously and interested in what they have to say.

Listening, however, is a difficult task for most people. It requires us to:

• Block out all distractions

• Be observant – use eyes and ears more than mouth!

• Keep an open mind and not be judgemental

• Stay calm, not rising to any bait

• Keep all personal prejudices at bay

• Listen all the way through

• And also listen for what is not being said – read between the lines.

Language:

In difficult situations most people are careful to choose their words by avoiding:

• Inflammatory language, e.g. “That’s impossible, no one else has complained about that”

• Criticism, e.g. “You should have contacted … dept”

• Swearing, e.g.!!**?*!!

• Insensitive language, e.g. “It’s not designed for people over XXX kilos”

• Negativity, e.g. “It’s not possible- we can’t do that”

• Overbearing, e.g. “It absolutely must be returned by …”

Non-Verbal Language:

Inappropriate words can hurt or incite anger in another. However, it is not the most powerful form of communication.

According to the experts the breakdown is a follows:

Language: Words used etc 7%

Voice: Tone, pitch etc 38%

Visual: Gestures, facial expression etc 55%

This is particularly true of communication relating to emotion. Positive language delivered in an abrasive or monotonous voice will have a negative impact. We’re more aware of how people say things than what they say.

Body Language:

Body language is understood by most people in business today. Inappropriate facial expressions, posture, sharp movements can make a situation much worse.

As a brief reminder. If you want to keep your unhappy customer calm, avoid:

• Putting up barriers – folded arms, glaring, hiding behind folders or a desk

• Aggressive gestures – finger pointing, posturing, hands on hips, feet apart

• Showing you are bored or irritated – foot tapping, sighing, looking at the clock

Stay relaxed, use open gestures; make good but not excessive eye contact. Even when you are talking on the telephone, these gestures can communicate through your voice. Be careful

Staying Positive:

Why is a positive style of communication helpful?

• It helps to keep everyone calm, including you

• Taking control of your actions gives you time to think, observe and stay objective

• It helps to prevent the situation from becoming worse, which would only give the customer something else to complain about

• It helps to counteract aggression – it’s difficult to shout at someone who is calm and controlled

• You are continuing to act in a professional manner, on behalf of the company, no matter how you might feel about the situation and the customer, it is important to remember that you are an ambassador.

Telephone Communication Skills:

One of the biggest disadvantages when trying to resolve a complaint with an angry customer over the telephone is the heavy reliance on language and voice. The phone is a sensitive instrument and people pick up on sighs and irritation. They also know whether or not you are eating, drinking or smoking. But they can’t see your face and have no idea whether or not you are taking them seriously. You can:

• Smile into the phone – it makes you sound friendly and caring

• Give plenty of verbal feedback to let them know you are listening; it’s no good nodding unless you have a video phone!

• Paraphrase and summarise to ensure you have fully understood

• Press the silent button if you need to confer with someone in the office, no one likes to hear themselves being talked about.

• Try to create an atmosphere of trust and sincerity – they need to know you’re not just saying anything to get rid of them

Written Communication:

When you only have words to play with, you have to make them work for you.

Whether you are writing a letter, sending an email or even a text message by phone, attention to detail is essential.

You never know who is going to see your written communication. It can always be used as evidence so you need to be clear, concise and correct.

Presentation speaks volumes and will go a long way to portraying the sort of company you are. Spelling, syntax, positioning of words all count.

Most importantly, make it a rule to reply as quickly as possible. Customers want a speedy response; at least, to their problem even if it takes a bit of time to sort out a solution. Days, even weeks, of silence will just make them more frustrated!

In Summary:

Successful organisations welcome complaints, because it usually means that the customer wants to reach a resolve, they do not want to go elsewhere. Often, our efficiency in dealing promptly, sympathetically and fairly with a complaint will actually strengthen our relationship with the customer.

At the end of the day customers expect us to deliver the “Five Rights”:

The right product

At the right price

Delivered to the right place

At the right time

In the right way.

Not too much to ask for is it?

In return we can expect their loyalty and repeat business, but we must always work to earn the right to that business.

Today’s News:

Ok, well you have all been extremely patient, so here is your FREE copy of “JF’s Blogging Good Year-Volume 3″ – I really hope you enjoy it – just click on the incredibly attractive banner above.

Very recently, I was discussing the essential traits of “Top 5% Sales Professionals” with a “non-sales person” and she suggested that surely they needed to agressive.

After I had climbed down from the ceiling, I very politely explained that the very last trait you would ever find in a successful front-line sales professional is aggressivenes. I then went on to explain the difference between assertiveness and aggressiveness.

Assertiveness skills are very important in many situations; by being assertive you are letting people know what you want, need or prefer, in a way which is acceptable to both you and them. Put simply; assertiveness is about getting what you want without upsetting anyone!

Let’s start by defining assertiveness.

Definition Of Assertion

“Expressing opinions, thoughts and feelings in a non-defensive manner clearly and openly. It is being able to make requests and to refuse requests that are unacceptable”

Indicators Of Non-Verbal Assertive, Aggressive & Passive Behaviour

If you want to become more assertive, pay particular attention to your non-verbal behaviour as this needs to be in line with your verbal behaviour. If they are at odds it is the non-verbal behaviour that is usually believed The following are indicators, and only that. Just because someone does not have good eye contact and looks away a lot, does not mean to say that they are passive. It is their whole demeanour that is important

Assertive Non-Verbal Behaviour

- Firm eye contact, not staring

- Expresses anger and pleasure in face when appropriate, sincere reaction

- Features are steady, not set or changing frequently

- Stands and sits upright

- Open hand movements – relaxed posture, head held up

Aggressive Non-Verbal Behaviour

- Tries to dominate by staring

- Finger pointing

- Gives very knowing smile and set face when angry

- Arms crossed

- Stands and sits upright, head ‘in air’, leaning forward

- Raised eyebrows in disbelief

- Jabbing movements with hands, banging desk, clenched fists

- Paces impatiently

- Sits forward or steps forward

Passive Non-Verbal Behaviour

- Hesitant eye contact

- Looks away often and down

- Over smiles, gives ghost smile, even if angry

- Quick changing features

- Slouches, head down

- Fluttering hand movement, or playing with fingers or wringing hands

- Sits back or steps back

- Eyes raised in anticipation

Now let’s take a look at verbal behaviour.

Indicators Of Verbal Assertive, Aggressive & Passive Behaviour

Assertive

- Questions to find out thoughts, requirements, etc. of others

- Offers suggestions and ideas, not advice

- Never blames others

- Distinguishes fact from fiction (assumption, opinion)

- Steady voice, clear, well pitched, warm and sincere

- ‘I’ statements. ‘I prefer’, ‘I’d like’

- Clear concise statements, to the point. ‘I’d like to introduce this into the department within 3 months’, instead of wrapping up what you want with so much waffle it is unclear what you actually want.

- Focusing on what can be done, not what can’t be done

- Problem solving statements

- Ability to give and receive feedback, both developmental and motivational

Aggressive

- Hard, brusque, over firm, voice rises at the end of sentences

- Too many ‘I’ statements

- Abrupt statements, often containing ‘My’ said in a superior fashion

- Hostile, threatening questions

- Blame put on anyone but self

- Gives feedback in the form of ‘Well, what you should do is…’ Does not solicit or accept feedback easily

- Doesn’t ask questions to find out facts, makes assumptions

- Sarcastic, point scoring

- Assumptions and opinions are put over as facts – uses statements like: ‘Well you probably wouldn’t remember’, and “Not that you’d understand”

Passive

- Often lifeless voice, too quiet, monotone, over warm, voice drops away at the end of the sentence

- Waffle, long-winded statements

- Uses lots of “fill-in” words e.g. ‘Um’, ‘Yes’, ‘Well’

- Continually apologises and asks permission

- Few ‘I’ statements

- Puts self down, ‘Well I never could do it as well as you’

- Feels the need to justify a great deal

- Agrees with people, often with people of opposing views (Just to keep the peace)

In Summary: We All Have Assertive Rights

• The right to be assertive

• The right to choose not to be assertive

• The right to have and to express our views

• The right to be listened to

• The right to make decisions

• The right to admit we don’t know

• The right to say ‘no’ without feeling guilty

• The right to be consulted about decisions affecting us

• The right to change our mind

• The right to be treated with respect

In fact, the right to do anything that does not violate the rights of others.

Today’s News: I know you have been waiting almost twelve months for the third edition of “JF’s Blogging Good Year” well the wait is almost over, because we publish tomorrow, and I think you’ll like it very much.

If you missed the w/e’s posts, you better scroll down: Momentous news about Top Sales World, and the chance to listen to the first TSE Sales Hard Talk interview

Last week we launched the TSE Sales Hard Talk interviews – well, that is to say we recorded a dry run, ahead of the official launch on October 20th.

My first guest was the TSE sponsor, Craig Klein of SalesNexus, who provided some excellent answers to some penetrating questions.

I was particularly keen to learn more about the SalesNexus Challenge, and I think you will want to learn more too.

You can listen in to the 15 minute interview HERE

And you can discover more about the “Challenge” by simply clicking on the banner below:

Last Wednesday, we shared some exciting news with the entire Top Sales Experts team, and now I can at last share that news with you.

When we formed Top Sales Associates in 2007, our original plan was to follow the successful launches of Top 10 Sales Articles and Top Sales Experts with a number of other “Top Sales” initiatives and create a global brand.

However, as we all know, time is a great “educator” and based on the experience we have gained during the last two years, and after lengthy discussions with the TSE Executive Board, we have decided to change our strategy.

The desire to ornate the definitive sales related location remains strong, but instead of diluting our offerings, we are going to merge them and build an all-encompassing, one-stop, “sales supermarket” – so welcome to …..

Top Sales World…The Global Sales Resource.

We intend to use the Top Sales Experts project as the foundation, and in fact, we will only be promoting the products/services/solutions of the TSE team, plus those of our  Sponsors and TSE Strategic Partners.

This is of course, our most ambitious project to date, and it is outside the scope of our existing resources. We will therefore be working with outsourced expertise where necessary, specifically; website design, copywriting and marketing.

The projected launch date is January 12th.

So let me share with you what precisely is involved.

Site Content – Existing Sections:

Top Sales Experts
Top Sales Masterclasses
Top Sales Roundtables
Top 10 Sales Articles
Top Sales Articles/Top Sales Podcasts/Top Sales Guides
Top Sales Newsletter/ Top Sales Ebook
Top Sales Assessments
Top Sales Blogs

Ok, so that’s the eleven existing successful sections. Now let me introduce you to the seven new ones …..

Top Sales Leadership Zone
Top Sales 2.0
Top Sales Tools
Top Sales Jobs
Top Sales Store
Top Sales Events
Top Sales Advice

Those then are the eighteen areas that we have identified, and there may be two more to be added before we launch.

For example, it would make sense to have a “Top Sales Resources” Section  where we promote our Strategic Partners.

Project Timetable:

Site design chosen – October
Build begins – November
Testing phase – Mid-December
Launch – January 12th

In Summary:

We are building the significant sales related location 
It will contain every conceivable sales resource
We will only be promoting the products/services/solutions of the TSE team and those of our sponsor and strategic partners

Top Sales World – Where in the world do you want to go today?

More soon….

All of us are either leaders or followers, and despite the focus usually being on leadership, unsurprisingly, some researchers prefer to move that focus away from the leader altogether and to examine instead what makes others prepared to follow these individuals.

In 1988 an important article published in the Harvard Business Review, entitled “In Praise of Followers”, began to shift attention away from the machismo of leadership to the less glamorous side of the same equation: the role of ‘followership’.

What the advocates of followership recognised was that to become an effective leader, most people first had to learn how to be good followers. With few exceptions, this is as true of the corporate world as it is of military and political leaders. Aristotle noted: “He who has never learnt to obey cannot be a good commander”.

More than ever today, business executives have to operate as both leader and follower in the daily rounds of their job. Those who study leadership begin to take more interest in the ‘psychological contract’ between leader and followers. In other words, they began to ask what makes people prepared to follow one leader and unwilling to follow another.

These ideas are now changing both the way we think about leadership and the style of our leaders. This is in tune with other social and organisational developments, including the move to more participative management and the rise of industrial democracy.

Other new ideas are also gaining ground. For example, only now is the notion of ‘emotional intelligence’ becoming widely understood. For the leaders of the future, it is likely to be as important as a high IQ.

In his ground-breaking 1996 book, “Emotional Intelligence”, the American psychologist Daniel Goleman explored the issue of personal and professional effectiveness. He argued that in a business world too often obsessed by cold analysis, the emotional climate is more important to the success of a leader than previously recognised. At senior levels, ‘emotional intelligence’ rather than ‘rational intelligence’ marks out the true leader: “The qualities of leadership and the quality of the heart are largely the same”. This may explain why someone like Branson, who twice failed his elementary mathematics exam, can make a better leader than someone with a degree from Harvard Business School. Branson’s ‘emotional intelligence’ – his ‘people radar’ – is more keenly developed.

According to Goleman, studies of outstanding performers in organisations show that about two thirds of the abilities that set star performers apart in the leadership stakes are based on emotional intelligence. Only a third of the skills that matter relate to raw intelligence (as measured by IQ) and technical expertise.

“Our emotions are hardwired into our being”, Goleman explained. “The very architecture of the brain gives feelings priority over thought.” There is a sign in Harvard’s rat lab that says: “Rats under carefully controlled conditions will do any damned thing they please.” The same is true of human beings. Leaders ignore emotions at their perils.

Most important of all, the role of leaders in developing the next generation has too often been neglected. If we are to grow as a society, this must be the priority for the future. As Sir Adrian Cadbury, the former Head of Cadbury Schweppes, has observed: “Good leaders grow people, bad leaders stunt them; good leaders serve their followers, bad leaders enslave them.”

Today’s News: A great new site launched recently called Sales Posse. It provides short, sharp, and occasionally quirky 150 word tips. Here is an example:

Why Men Don’t Listen and Why Women Can Watch “The View”

MRI studies show women have 14-16 areas in the brain to store more language and behavioral messages to men’s 4-6. That’s why women can watch The View, talk to their sister on the telephone, and paint their toenails flaming red; and men go nuts when women interrupt their ball games. Mult-taskers v. one-trackers.

How can men listen better? Two ways. First, according to Robert Cialdini (Influence), sit up straight, keep both feet flat on the floor, and keep your chin up. You can increase your retention by over 38% by doing this simple feat with your feet.

Second. Take your wife with you.

Take a look

Success should be something you don’t just ‘Kinda Sorta’ want to achieve but something you must achieve.

Generally top achievers expect to be successful and as a consequence they usually are. They are driven by a ‘have to’ attitude not a ‘want to’ attitude.

If you have no concrete goals and you have been succeeding in spite of yourself, just think how much more success you could enjoy if you set your sights on a definite path and had a specific time-frame in which you expect to reach your destination.

Setting Goals Keeps You Focussed:

What you should know is that goals give you three distinct advantages, which help you succeed:

• Goals keep you on track.
• Goals let you know when and what to celebrate.
• Goals give you a focussed plan to work with.

If nothing else, goals let others know what they have to aim for to keep up with your standards.

Effective Goal Setting:

Take the time to think about what would make you happy, contented and satisfied and about what would motivate you to become a Top 5% Player.

It’s important to remember that goals are maps; they will guide you towards your success – the more detailed your goal setting the easier it will be for you to reach your destination.

When you are in the first stage of goal setting you also need to remember two important factors – i.e.

• The goal must be better than your best yet – but it must be achievable.
• Goals should be based on productivity not production.

Keeping these two rules of goal setting firmly in your mind will help you to form and stay committed to what is really important to you.

Today’s News: Yesterday, we had our monthly Top Sales Experts team online gathering, and it really was an excellent session, and extremely well attended – thanks to everyone, you really are a wonderful group of people. Can I share our future plans that were revealed yesterday? No, not yet, but very soon, I promise. Will you be excited? Oh yes, definitely!

But, I can share with you the details of today’s TSE Masterclass, which is being hosted by Steven Rosen.

The ABC’s of Unlocking Sales Performance
Thursday October 1st 2009 1:00 PM EASTERN

Attention Sales Executives!

A – You are responsible for driving sales in your organization.

B – Your sales force is your company’s most expensive promotional resource. Yet far too many sales organizations operate well below their potential.

C – To thrive in difficult times you need to look at new ways to drive sales performance.

Learn how successful companies unlock the potential in their sales organization and:

   1. Build a high-performance sales organization
   2. Hire and retain top talent
   3. Consistently exceed sales objectives
   4. Turn their training investment into sustainable sales performance
   5. Improve accountability and commitment

Leadership + inspiration = $uccess!

Attend this session and make 2010 the year you achieve breakthrough results!

Just click on the button for full details